The curse of Fu-Manchu and why Opium is bad for you

I thought submarines were supposed to go underwater...oh wait I see what you mean

Stuart, you should know by now that Russian / Rossia is not a position that goes in for Maritime activities, getting ships to the depths of the Ocean has never been a problem, but getting them ot come up again is a bit more tricky.

Maybe change crew diets & give them extra helpings of Red pickled cabbage & Onion, this may increase the gas volume inside the subs & help with resurfacing.

F-ood
A-ssisted
R-esurfacing
T-echnology

Is being developed in Nippon as we speak.

The Feb 1861 edition of the Britannic Times has shown up and for non scabble players here are the highlights/low lights.

1) The Chinese Post Office is considering banning post to Nippon after one of their postmen tried to give the Prime Minister of Nippon a letter from the honourable Doctor Fu-Manchu..............and got beheaded by a Ninga!

2) Questions are being asked if the Taiwan Haggis is in any way related to Scots Haggis.  Probably because the Taiwan species has eight legs, rather more than the Scots Haggis.

- Anything with eight arms of legs or arms........Keli, Great Cthulhu or Taiwan Haggis tends to viewed as highly suspect by the HEIC and the British Government which may limit export markets for premium Taiwan Haggis.

3) General Miyoshi and the cavalry of Nippon went looking for General Yan Xishan.....and failed to find him so the Sino-Nippon War was a bit of a non event this month.  Which was just a well for that famous war reporter Victor Hugo who wanted join the war this month but found himself on a Russian Battleship sailing in totally the wrong direction.  However, Victor did manage a exclusive interview with Queen Min of Korea

4) With the Queen on a boating trip, the Emperor dead on the business end of a Cossack lance and its mounted lords in disgrace for running away the village elders and the merchants in Yalu (and the rest of Korea?) seem to have achieved "enlightenment" and declared that the Czar is the one and only Khan of Khans and supreme Lord.

5) According to the Orthodox Church the Czar and his army are blessed by God! Devine blessing may have got the Chin Government to accept the Czar as a sort of equal (they sent him an envoy) but unfortunately it does not give Russian Envoys an ability to navigate (lost in Conroe) or Russian submarines the power to re-surface.

- The later event is now the subject of a special Duma Committee and they have not yet ruled out sabotage.

6) Meanwhile the Germans managed to sink another one of their submarines with half of the fuss and bother of the Russians.

7) Various clubs being openned in both America and Britannia as well as a lot of fuss about torpedo's but all in all a quite month in the Brittanic world.......But is this just a lull?

A haggi with 8 legs....me thinks Mr Glover has been had

Jason wrote:A haggi with 8 legs....me thinks Mr Glover has been had

I wonder if Mr Glover has Crabs?

Mr Glover has a theory that his cook Wie Sin Ding may have sewn two Haggi together to ensure there was enough to go round & save time in cooking.

If Mr Glover has Crabs then no doubt he will try to fry them!

MAybe he needs to send a Homing Parrot to his mother in Scotland to get a recipe on how to prepare Haggis

J Flower wrote:Mr Glover has a theory that his cook Wie Sin Ding may have sewn two Haggi together to ensure there was enough to go round & save time in cooking.

If Mr Glover has Crabs then no doubt he will try to fry them!

MAybe he needs to send a Homing Parrot to his mother in Scotland to get a recipe on how to prepare Haggis

If the Taiwan Haggis is actually a breed of giant land crab that would make it a sort of sea food.

Think Scots theory is if it comes out of water its fish and fryable!

Stuart Bailey wrote:

Jason wrote:A haggi with 8 legs....me thinks Mr Glover has been had

I wonder if Mr Glover has Crabs?

Chinese Mitten Crabs perhaps? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinese_mitten_crab

Jason wrote:

Stuart Bailey wrote:

Jason wrote:A haggi with 8 legs....me thinks Mr Glover has been had

I wonder if Mr Glover has Crabs?

Chinese Mitten Crabs perhaps? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinese_mitten_crab

Good eating on Mitten Crabs but can you fry them?

Considering the amount of damage they do to dams and the like could we be looking at an escaped population from a secret Nippon Military base? Trying to cross a burrowing crab with the Giant Nippon Spider Crab and train it to burrow into timber line ships?

Perhaps abandoned after people started to build Ironclads.

thanks for the ideas your giving me, with the crabs.

Also looking into Bamboo- copters.

Trained sharks with explosive packages strapped ot their backs that explode under enemy shipping.

Also the military usage of Homing Parrots is being further developed, training them to listen in to military meetings & repeat what they here. Could be a lot of Parrot feathers fly in coming months.

Bit worried the the Dr may be upset that one of his postmen has had anindustrial accident delivering his letter to Nippon, just know something bad is going ot happen as revenge.

The HEIC has just come up with a theory that fake Haggis, Coca-Cola, Root Beer and the vile American Candy which pretends it is Chocolate are all spawn of the New York based Cthulhu cult and the HEIC is now on a mission from God (well the C of E) to wipe them out and replace them with proper Haggis, Tea/Iced Tea, India Pale Ale & proper Cider and Cadbury's etc.

So far we seem to have had conflicts over the Slave Trade and ongoing Opium Wars. Will the conflict between the Brits and Amerika North over trade in the Wild West and the Amerika's now be known as Chocolate Wars?

PS Ref the death by Ninga of one of Dr Fu-Manchu's messengers I dont think Jason Flower needs to worry over that. If revenge happens it was probably going to happen away due to the Nippon invasion of Chin.

"Sharks with frickin lasers on their heads" Austin Powers film.

Nippon has already got ahead in the technology for the Chocolate wars the Marine, Army, Ration, Supplement or MARS for short has been introduced already, in fried & non fried versions.

Would like ot poin tout Nippon hasn't invaded Chin, we are on an expedition into the mountains looking for a lost tribe of Yeti Haggiherders, which according to Nipponese folklore inhabit the region.

I would like to thank all fellow players of Scramble for Empire. have only been playing for a few months but I notice already how much effort is being put into the game by all of you, Another exellent turn by you all has just arrived.

Anyon eout there looking for a slightly more lihgt hearted look at Victorian era of madcap invention, Occultisum, Intrigue (oh yes the occassional hostile act may also occur but that is seen as secondary )

Well worth a look at & play if you have time , energy & a sense of humour

J Flower wrote:I would like to thank all fellow players of Scramble for Empire. have only been playing for a few months but I notice already how much effort is being put into the game by all of you, Another exellent turn by you all has just arrived.

Anyon eout there looking for a slightly more lihgt hearted look at Victorian era of madcap invention, Occultisum, Intrigue (oh yes the occassional hostile act may also occur but that is seen as secondary )

Well worth a look at & play if you have time , energy & a sense of humour

Occassional hostile acts have included two French Presidents murdered or missing, the death by drowning (in a Washington Street?) of a US President, bombing Bismarck, trying to drop a roof on the Chairman of the HEIC and several deaths by Nun.

But - "Its all been done in the best possible taste!"

All done with a laugh & a smile.

Seems Nippon has also got access to Flying fighting units , Manned kites are allowed for Nippon, so bombardment with fried Mars bars is a definate possibility in the coming game turns. Combined with the Kamakazi units could be a danger to shipping. -Most probably my own-.

Her Majesty's Government is not amused and would rather shoot the those that get in the way of our making the world British and well... Money!

Seems to be a common problem in scabble.......go nuts......want to fly.........crash!

But I think there may be a place for place for arial recon in scabble or daring escapes in the style of ACW, Franco-Prussian war, and around the world in 80 days. Anything else and its probably "splat" esp if it involves flying over ships fitted with maxim guns.

Well we have seen submarines as a cutting edge technology fail to rise to the challenge, so maybe the only way is up . Nippon has Rockets & Kites just need to combine the two; & the skys the limit!

March 1861 Britannic Times has shown up and for non scabble players here are the highlights & lowlights:

- After a long siege the Port of Casablanca and the province of Kasbah has come under German control.  Captured Muurish troops were given the opportunity to join German forces but declined the offer........probably scared that they would end up in the German Navy and drown!
Some Muur's are claiming that the Mahdi is the new Sultan and will save them!!  If that is the case it may be some time before the Africa Corp is able to sail for Chin to take revenge for Dr Fu-Manchu burning down a German brewery.

- Speaking of the good Doctor he has issued more threats on a world wide basis and is currently getting the blame for air pollution problems in Washington DC getting so bad that some people are saying the city will have to be abandoned.

- Adding to the problems of Amerika North it seems their southern rivals have found gold in the province of Miridian.  Plus Amerika North now seems to be in a all out battle of the brands (Economic War): On one side we have Goldman Sachs & cutting edge totally ruthless American Capitalism while on the other we have a bunch Hymn singing Christian tea drinking pinko-socialist feudal relics in the HEIC.  Surely this can only have one result? Stories the lightning rods are being fitted to Coca-Cola plants in case of lightning strikes and the one good man in New York has started to collect animals into a large timber ark have yet to be confirmed.

- The Russians have taken over the province of Kuan but backed with the might of Nippon technical inovation the Empire of the Rising Sun has yet to take over Shansi with General Miyoshi troops now reduced to rounding up Chin villagers and taking them to "education centres" so as to seperate the Chin fighters from their civilian and logistic support and turn the people Japanese (sounds like a song).  How Dr Fu-Manchu and the wider population of Chin will re-act to the news that the Hero's of Shansi are being starved into surrender is anyones guess but he probably will not be happy.

- A John Company army backing the claims of Transoxian Royalty moved into Gerze and while crossing an area of soft sand known as the Gerze Depression had its right flank cavalry ambushed by Qing Khan Xin of Gerze.  If it had been the Bengal Lancers or the Poona Light Horse this cunning plan to isolate and ambush a small section in difficult terrain would probably have worked.  Unfortunately for Qing Khan Xin he had picked on elements of Skinners Horse - Students of Grand Master Flashy, Masters of the way of the Zen Art known as "The Way of Wrist Spin & the Lee-Enfield" or The Way" for short.  Resulting in Khan Xin getting his head blown off.

- In Rawipindi Gov George Currie has visited a new cricket bat factory and also visited "education centres" known as schools were he handed out prizes and even bought sea cadets a couple of new boats.

- Thomas Glover may have had first contact with the Haggis Herders of Taiwan........that or he had a few too many to drink.

- Finally in Nippon they are involved with two really dangerous activities - Kamikaze Kite Flying and dealing ith the Albion Corporation (AKA the Opium Corporation). Oh Dear, Oh Dear what is the good Doctor going to think about in Nippon invaders dealing with the Brits he views as responsible for the posioning of  millions in Chin?

- Finally while Dr Fu worries about alliances between Nippon and the Hongs another Russian Fleet seems to be heading East.  Leading to that old Chin saying "Opium is bad for you but sometimes helps if your leg has been eat by a Bear".

PS Is it only me who is starting to worry that this game is turning very metaphysicial? If not down right weird ever since Flashman got shot.

Forgot to add in last post if anyone wants to join scrabble and drag it back to a proper game of Empire building (or even dive into the current Madness)......while you can take a untouched position some players prefer to pick up a position which has already seen some development if you are one of these you may like to consider following positions which I believe to be free:

- France........developed R & D, colonies & well established diplomatic relations/alliances inc Persia, Moors & Ottomans. Problems inc you are currently a Republic and people want to bring back the Empire/Monarchys and the Huns are currently pinching your colonies and beating up your former allies. Your Navy may also be in a bit of a mess following clash with Russians but it probably needed to be re-built anyway.

Can be played in loads of different ways.

- Siam........developed R & D following some good trades by its former Prime Minister and movement of major trade company HQ to a low tax and friendly state, some extra colonies and its still No2 on the Prestige list. Problems include a King who is interested in his Harem and Photo's and a strong belief that Siam is linked to Triads/Opium trade.

Seems to have been played as both a Siam version of restoration Japan, Mild mannered PM by day......boss of the Purple Lotus by night and full on "King & I"...........personally I think you clearly need a bald King advised by your childrens English Governess who can write to the Britannic Times.

- Austria & Italy...........Some R & D (inc Air ships), some extra colonies, no real problems apart from the air race.

- Amerika (South).........Expanded strongly but was then bullied into freeing its slaves by a Crusading Emperor of Austria backed by the Brits. Interesting Lord Derby seems to have done the South a favour in agreeing to fund the freeing of Southern Slaves on same terms as British Empire ones and giving the green light to British Investment in the South.

- Amerika (North)............Perfect position for player who likes to play Jacobites, French Protestants or any Polish position in Glori and wants a real challenge on oh so many different levels:

Can you invoke your inner Abe Lincoln (Vampire slayer?) and take back the South to re-unite the Union, Save New York from free masony and general oddness, fight Indians, get the Brits out of the Ohio Valley. Plus you will probably need to calm down a raging HEIC who believe Goldman Sachs, Root Beer, Coca-Cola and the Candy which pretends to be Chocolate are spawn of the New York Freemason Cult of Cthulhu. Basically its a bit of a problem trying to convince the good old boys down south to re-join the Union when its going all "Gangs of New York" around you! Meanwhile Colin Thomas Vandervent, Duke of Suffolk, Governor of Britannic Amerika is getting really comfortable in the Ohio Valley.

The Nipponese Blue Parrot Messaging Company is also looking for a director to get the company off the ground.

You get a free Coffee Espresso machine & a selection of some of the best Chocolate bars money can buy( deep frying is a no cost extra)

Looks like this turn has seen the agents of Dr Fu- Manchu visiting the sights & sounds of European culture & society. How the rest of the world will react to Chin tourists is yet to be seen.

April 1861 Britannic Times has shown up and for non scabble players here are the highlights & lowlights - But by special request written from a SiFan viewpoint:

- As per the forecast by the supreme wisdom of Dr Fu-Manchu the top five on the Prestige list is starting to show the glorious rise of Asia and the decline of Europe and Amerika with two of the top five being the Asiatic powers of Sima and Nippon (though the less said about the corrupt and de-based leadership of these powers the better). Also on the list is the half Asiatic Empire of Rossia who's leader claims to the Khan of Khans and the heir to the Golden Horde and the half Chin Albion Corporation. The final power on the list is the root of all evil, sink of moral depravity and the great Imperialist foreign devil........The Empire of Britannia.

- In Paris the great and glorious SiFan punished and humiliated the French Imperialists by the destruction of a nasty monument to Napoleon III and a raid on the ITC office which reduced French Railways to a standstill for a month.

- In Berlin Nippon's director of trade was busy showing the superior nature of Asian Silk to inferior European rivals. Naturally, the very best silk comes from Chin and the silk from Nippon is a vastly inferior copy of Chin Silks but no doubt German barbarians are delighted with even this inferior product.

- In Britannia the foolish Lord Beaconsfield was trying to talk dowm his fear of Dr Fu-Manchu. The foolish but bold words do not seem to have worked on Lord Weatherbee who has taken his American Halot and fled the SiFan in Amerika......fleeing all the way to the wild's of darkest Somerset. Does not this foolish man know that you can run but not hide from the rage of the Doctor and the SiFan?

- In St Petersburg our great ambassador Ki-Ming spent the month soothing Russian Bear with smooth and kind words. According to the Doctor the Russian Hordes are strong but stupid and should be kept happy with a little flattery until such time as Chin is ready to deal with the Barbarians to our North.

- In Tangier the great and glorious SiFan punished and humiliated the German Imperialists who have now lost their communications with Berlin, the last of their fleet and have a arsenal full of ruined weapons.

- After reading the dread words of Doctor Fu-Manchu in Mandarin and German "SiFan have arisen. Nowhere is safe from the Doctor's vengeance" the German Imperialists were so scared that they set free the captive Sultan of the Muurs and begged the Muurs for peace. It will be interesting to see if the cowardly Sultan still has any authority over the anti Imperialist forces fighting the invaders in the name of the Mahdi who this month over ran the Grand Erg region and captured the infamous teacher of Imperialist Propaganda and whore of Bismark Sister Marie la Jugulaire.

- Some stuff seems to be happening in Amerika and India but it is of little interest to Chin. Oddly the John Company Army seems to have taken up making offerings of gin and angel cake to the spirits but as they continue to crush the people of Indea and force them to play cricket and eat Jaffa Cakes its clear that the HEIC has not changed its spots. According to the devine wisdom of Dr Fu-Manchu once Sima and Nippon return the lands they have stolen from Chin and pay the tribute they owe the Chin Empire it may be possible to make common cause with them but with evil British Hongs who poison our people with Opium and ruin Chin companies like the Loyal Taiping General Goods Traders Company of Nanking which went out of business this month SiFan can never make peace.

- Ref the just punishment of Nippon for its illegal occupation of Chin Islands and other Chin lands the SiFan skowed the anger of the Doctor this month by burning the Nippon owned Ring of Fire brewery in Tsing-Tao and by routing the Japanese Cavalry in Shansi. It is to be hoped that Pride of Nippon is now humbled without the need for any more harsh punishments. According to the Divine wisdom of the Doctor it is permitted for Nippon and Sima to employee slaves from Europa in the harem of Sima or the slave Thomas Glover in the service of Nippon. But to enter into business agreements and alliances with the Hongs without the express permission of their overlord the Emperor of Chin is forbidden and should stop with immediate effect.

- The Britannic Times then ended as is only rights with the Dread Words of the Doctor.........it will be interesting to see how many follow the path of wisdom and seek mercy from the Doctor and how many will need further punishment.

‘The Huge, Self-Powered, Operator Steerable, Mechanical Roller Driven by Steam’. Device obviously Someone has stolen the plans for this from the Nippon Offices of "The Research, Development , Construction, Deployment of Devices , for Military & Commercial Practices"

I blame the SiFan for all of it.