G7 - The War of the English Succession & the breaking of the Pirate Brotherhood

Only if you promise to give me back the mint sauce

Feb 1710 issue of the Glori du Roi showed up some time ago and for non players in G7 here are the highlights:

1) EDINBURGH CASTLE FALLS TO RUSSIANS & JACOBITES !!! or depending on your viewpoint.

- Taken captive in the Castle......William of Orange King of Scots & Stadtholder (Ex King of England & Ireland), A large chunk of the Scots Government & a number of envoys inc the HRE envoy Prince Eugene of Savoy.

- A Spanish relief force which had blasted its way through a large Cavalry Screen proceeded to capture the breach in the West wall of Edinburgh and held open a gap in the siege lines. But King William & the Scots never attempted a break out which left the Count of Gerona looking like a bit of a wall flower.

- To make matters worse for the Count nasty stories are now being spread that one of his Regimental Goats is missing (Kipnapped by Cossacks)

2) The question now is how will the Czar & the Jacobites use their victory? The hardline Jacobite view is believed to be "Hang them all & their goat as well" then abolish the Kirk, Scots Parliament & hunt down & destroy all "Rebels" and their allies.

- When not dreaming of slow cooked goat in vodka or burning down Rome in his more sober moments the Czar has issued a press statement which indicates a willingness to hand out pardons, allow free passage and make peace using the proposed treaty of Glasgow as a basis. It is noted that the Czar is not interested in a congress peace after the dog's dinner peace of Warsaw & may be against starting a blood feud with Alpine Goat Farmers (AKA the Royal House of Hapsburg).

3) The other part of the Russian Statement seems to be staying the St Peterburg was not built in the Swedish province of Ingernia but on land given to Russia by some place called Estomia and the Czar is not going to give it back to the Swedes as per the peace agreed in Warsaw.

4) In London KIng James has been seen in the Company of Lady Catherine Seymour, a HWIC property got raided by the Government & the Lord High Chancellor is believed to have died in a attempted robbery at his home.

5) In Bristol the Oak Mill Factory (a HWIC company?) has gone out of business.

6) In Hastings, Austrian troops raided English Artillery positions but did not do much damage. The English seem to be more bothered by the Rain than the Austrians.

7) Versailles........King Louis XIV is bothered that if Prince Eugene does not get back to Europe in time for Louis XIV next war then France's Glory will be lowered.

- Also in Versailles no doubt as a gesture of good will King James tried to send Countess Mary of Ghent some black morning dresses (following the death of Maria Anna Josepha, Electress of Bavaria). Sadly Lord Godolphin Ex Whig & Crony of Churchill & hater of Louis XIV now a Loyal Jacobite (honest) turned this kind and considerate gift into a insult aimed at the Countess of Hainault.

- The Charming Countess proceeded to make Godolphin look like a ungracious fool before the whole court.

The Spanish Court has gone into mourning for Maria Anna Josepha " The fair rose of the House of Hapsburg"

9) In Criminal News two staff members of the Brunn Artillery Academy have gone missing while English merchants have been charged with smuggling in Marsilles.

10) In Wilmington Hale & Stark troops knocked the hell out of each other with Hale finally abandoning Wilmington to Stark's troops after nine days of fighting.

I'd like to point out in my defence it was only the one goat, & I had been drinking.

J Flower wrote:I'd like to point out in my defence it was only the one goat, & I had been drinking.

Thats what they all say!!! But first it starts with a goat, next its Baltic provinces and before you know it the Russian Bear has swallowed half of the Polish Commonwealth.

Oh Stuart Stuart Stuart, everyone knows that the Czar's current government are peace-loving and misunderstood...I mean, those Russian troops in Scotland were just going on a package holiday tour of the distilleries and things got a bit out of hand...

The Russian government is looking to sue the owners of Hapsburg Holidays"a place in the Sun for everyone, " Admitted they were a bit suspicious when they saw the Austrians had booked the same trip, but at least they have the option of an open topped bus tour of London.
What do the Russians get, yes they get a goat. Do you know how much they charge extra for the mint sauce, not going there again.plus the weather is terriable, Room service is awful, the chances of being robbed, burnt or murdered in you bed were not mentioned in the booking office. The neighbours are also extremlly noisy.

The Russians just want ot go home & see their families & Grannies. Is it too much to ask.

With William now in a B&B in Scotland, run by his friend James. Maybe they can have a nice little chat & we can all go home before we all have to look to book tickets for the South of France. Where hopefully the weather is better. Then admittedly the goat is a darn sight better than snails.

The Russian bear is also nice & cuddly it likes being scratched behind it's ears, It is also rumoured to be a Vegan. Please don't spread rumours about it being the kind of creature that will rip your arm off & beat you to death with the soggy end. (Thats only on Saturdays after a night out with Cossacks).
He is very sensetive & caring & always looks after his Mum.

J Flower wrote:Room service is awful, the chances of being robbed, burnt or murdered in you bed were not mentioned in the booking office. The neighbours are also extremlly noisy.

Glasgow still hasn't changed that much

Just joined game 7 as Prussia, not sure after reading this info whether that is a good or bad thing.

Bad, definatly BAD,

Still hope you enjoy the circus.

Do you like goats?

I am rather partial to mountain goats!!!! They is good eatin!

meanwhile in Africa......

Where the weather is blistering hot, you can always get a lovely suntan, when you come back to Europe no one will recognise you.

That's the problem my uniform once black is now a shade of light grey...

Kingmaker wrote:That's the problem my uniform once black is now a shade of light grey...

Look on the bright side........if your coat is sort of off white/pearl grey you can now join French, Spanish or Austrian Regiments without the need to buy a new coat.

Of course it may also allow Richard greater opportunity to have you character charged with desertion or spying.

Stuart Bailey wrote:

Kingmaker wrote:That's the problem my uniform once black is now a shade of light grey...

Look on the bright side........if your coat is sort of off white/pearl grey you can now join French, Spanish or Austrian Regiments without the need to buy a new coat.

Of course it may also allow Richard greater opportunity to have you character charged with desertion or spying.

I have enough troubles already please do not encourage him...

any one had their turn back yet?

Yes, 0745 this morning.

Not, good, not good......

Ha I got mine before 7am, you will be fine...

But a very interesting first turn.

got mine as well all is good

Kingmaker wrote:got mine as well all is good

Probably because the Asante think (from the colour of your coat) that you are a nice man from Spain, France or Austria.

What happens when they find out you are one of those nasty Prussians?

Ooooooh! Everybody loves a Prussian

Stuart Bailey wrote:

Kingmaker wrote:got mine as well all is good

Probably because the Asante think (from the colour of your coat) that you are a nice man from Spain, France or Austria.

What happens when they find out you are one of those nasty Prussians?

Actually this is what happened to me this turn:

You say to the professor, “Ask what they want, is it satisfaction or something else?”
He relays the question, and they speak - well shout - over each other that ‘yes we do want
satisfaction, how much are you going to pay us to prevent our javelins sticking out of your body
which is that of a bloated pig-goat’. That at least is the rough translation the professor gives while
adding meekly that indeed some meaning or nuance of language may have been lost in the process.

Somewhat affronted by what you consider in any language must be a personal insult, you have the
professor iterate that the satisfaction you offer is combat.

He looks concerned. “Are you sure, they may take offence?”

The irony is not on either of you, so without even a reply by you being given to that question - since
he knows as well as you do that they have been insulting you - he relays the message. He points at
you several times while doing so, giving the distinct impression that he is making sure they realize
they are your words and not his.

This makes the natives shout a lot and shake their javelins in your direction. They bare their teeth,
and now seems the appropriate time to take out your false eye and hold it before you.
The Africans falter in their verbal barrage.
You say to the eye, “Remember them and curse them if they harm me.”
They no doubt can’t understand what you said, but have fallen silent. Then they stepped back a
couple of paces and are quietly talking amongst themselves. They ask the professor for something,
and he answers in their native tongue.

He tells you, “They say they have met your sort before, and are not going to disturb the spirits of the
dead.... and that they understand now and will be leaving.”

You clean the false eye and put it back, asking the professor to tell them the spirit of my eye has
marked them forever now and will always follow them even if you are killed. He is going to translate
it, but before he can they have fled back into the bush and can no longer be seen.

The journey continues, and you make it to Accra...

That looks good, its always handy having a false eye.

Maybe you should start a collection, with a wooden leg or a hook instead of a hand, see how much of you is left in the original state when you return to Europe.

J Flower wrote:Maybe you should start a collection, with a wooden leg or a hook  instead of a hand, see how much of you is left in the original state when you return to Europe.

I already have a large scar down my face across the eye that is missing ....

do you want to make me more unattractive?