The Age of Enlightenment. Game 9.

Dec 1700 Journal has shown up and dispite being so inbreed (on paper) as to be his own uncle and related to himself XXXX times over the new King of Spain has been born and mother and baby are doing well.

Dispite a feeling voiced only by the Bavaria Envoy that the whole thing is a con the true heirs and their families have accepted Junior as a  Hapsburg and heir to Spain.  

Other than that news not a lot happening........Louis XIV who is clearly going soft in his old age has restored the Edict of Nantes as well as ccepting the con in Spains.  But has also claimed most of North America,  I suspect Louis may be trying to clear all the things which could hinder a massive show down with England.

The Emperor is still being nice to his Electors and trying to run the Empire in a friendly and co-operative manner (herding Cats comes to mind) but is still are daggers drawn with Venice.

No blood drawn yet but it seems that the Emperor's trusty Elector of Saxony (who is also King of Poland) is in the Ukraine pondering the big Questions in Life with his Hetmen - 1) Is Grain or Potatoe Vodka better?????? and 2) Can they accept the Emperor's cash to raid, loot and plunder in Venice without the Ukraine being raided in return by the Doge Tartar Allies?

Seems the Emperor wants 6000 riders which Whyowski thinks would reduce the defences of the Ukraine to an unacceptable degree while Jerzy Lubormirski thinks 30,000 is no problem.  Wonder if the Hetman has been reading Ottoman books on social policy such as "How to keep peace at home by exporting trouble makers." and hopes to use the Emperor's cash to invite the Tartar's and other Cossack Bands to the party.

One suspects that the Enlightened approach of G9 may have hit a small Saxon shaped problem.

The Enlightened approach to G9 however seem alive and well in the far East were Tokugawa Tsunayoshi Shogun of Japan continues to be the most enlightened ruler in G9 and the Kwantung Chinese have made the enlightened decision to only sale tea leaves rather than seed.

An unfortunate misunderstanding by the King of Poland. The Emperor merely wants 6000 Cossacks to act as a circus troop to entertain the people's of the Reich with their horsemanship, singing and squat dancing. The Emperor is a man of peace and only wishes to enjoy his new Orchestra and Opera company.

Goldstar wrote:An unfortunate misunderstanding by the King of Poland.  The Emperor merely wants 6000 Cossacks to act as a circus troop to entertain the people's of the Reich with their horsemanship, singing and squat dancing.  The Emperor is a man of peace and only wishes to enjoy his new Orchestra and Opera company.

And he is not even a little bit upset that the Doge has:

1) Stolen the Duchy of Milan from the Hapsburg Family
2) Called the Emperor lots of nasty names - Senile Old Duffer - Springs to mind.
3) Humiliated his Electors and their Envoys - Poor Zamoyshi locked up in a wet and cold Venetian Goal.
4) Conspired with the Tartar Slavers to raid Christain lands such as Hungary
5) Stolen recruits from Imperial Lands (Bavaria)
6) Blockaded the Austrian Coast to stop Trade and threatened to sink Austrian Ships on sight.

    what is going on in Glory du Roi? First we had the Beys of Rumelia turning from bloody handed Ghazi into pastry Chefs, Then in G8 & G9 we have Louis XIV as the kindly elder Statesman of Europe who just wants to keep the peace and even goes soft on the Huguenots and now we have soft and cuddly Hapsburgs turning the other cheek to a Venetian Pirate & Rogue who makes Blackbeard seem honourable.

Where have all the War Lords gone?       

Stuart! I'm miffed, are you suggesting that one can't be "Blood Thirsty" and a Connoisseur of tasty pastry treats at the same time ?.
Such a Slur! All I can say is your lucky I'm in a good mood due to my Sugar level overload.

One Grain.  

one grain of grain wrote:Stuart! I'm miffed, are you suggesting that one can't be "Blood Thirsty" and a Connoisseur of tasty pastry treats at the same time ?.
Such a Slur! All I can say is your lucky I'm in a good mood due to my Sugar level overload.

One Grain.  

I look forward to hearing that the men of a captured Venetian Army have been found impaled and choked on a Danish Pastry.

Some of us, in game 8 that is, are still trying to pirate raid, slave raid, and about to embark upon palace assassinations in order to keep up the reputation of the Ottoman Empire.

Basileus wrote:Some of us, in game 8 that is, are still trying to pirate raid, slave raid, and about to embark upon palace assassinations in order to keep up the reputation of the Ottoman Empire.

Palace assassinations?!?! Bring on the popcorn, this I gotta see!

Another turn passes with more name calling between Austria and Venice, but no war as of yet. The Emperor calls for Papal intervention, whilst the Doge hints he wants Genoa as well as Milan, perhaps the rest of Italy as well. The Spanish succession appears settled with the miracle child Philliph, although the regency is disputed. English anti-popery continues to increase, whilst the the French offer toleration to their Protestants? The King of Poland/ Elector of Saxony continues on his increasingly drunken progress around Poland, opening relishing the prospect of a Austrian-Venetian War.

Goldstar wrote:Another turn passes with more name calling between Austria and Venice, but no war as of yet.  The Emperor calls for Papal intervention, whilst the Doge hints he wants Genoa as well as Milan, perhaps the rest of Italy as well.  The Spanish succession appears settled with the miracle child Philliph, although the regency is disputed.  English anti-popery continues to increase, whilst the the French offer toleration to their Protestants?  The King of Poland/ Elector of Saxony continues on his increasingly drunken progress around Poland, opening relishing the prospect of a Austrian-Venetian War.

While the above from Goldstar is factually correct I do think its a somewhat polite version of events and more emphasis should be placed on:

1) Why is Lord Godolphin asking for secret meetings with William of Orange?

2) Which Protestant ruler trusts the French enough to act as guarantor for the new Edict of Nantes?

3) The Elector of Brandenburg has finally said in Public what everyone is thinking..........that after 22 years and two wives the couple of month old Phillip Hapsburg King of Spain is not the son of the last King.

On wonders if the Emperor will be able to keep a straight face while slapping down the Elector for calling his sister in law a whore who Cuckolded Carlos II.

Perhaps due to shame or perhaps because some people are asking why Cardinal Portocarrero is Regent rather than the Kings Mother?

Actually, since Carlos II never named a regent for his "son" it would be historic and correct for Spain to have a Council of Regency. King Philip should also have a seperate Regency for Flanders and the Kingdom of Naples.

4) If Naples does get a Council of Regents one wonders if Cardinal Portocarrero will try and get the Doge of Venice named as a Regent of Naples or at least Sicily (were he would seem to have "Family" links).

The Doge latest offer to Genoa "its only Business" has been turned down.........one now wonders if the Doge of Genoa will now wake up with a horses head in his bed. Or like poor Senetor Contarini face down in the docks. If he does one wonders who the Doge of Venice will frame for the Crime?

5) After setting up Ambassador Zanoyski for the murder of his political opponent Contarini the Doge now hopes to use him as a human Shield to protect both Venice and his Tarter Slave Raiding Allies. With Zanoyski being held captive in the Crimea alongside the 14,000 other Christain Poles, Russians, Hungarians etc hald captive by the Doge's Slaver Allies.

The Question which I now wonder about is......... the Doge and his Crimean allies are getting the diplomatic better of enlightened and civilized rules like the Elector of Bavaria & the Holy Roman Emperor. But will the same tactics/concerns about Zanoyski stop Augustus and his Vodka drinking Support?

6) Or is this the Doge master plan.......start a new Ottoman War so nither Austrians or Ottomans have time cut chunks out of Venice?
Personally, if I was the Ottoman Grand Vizier /Sultan I would look to calm things in the north and take back the Morea and throw the Venetians out of the Balkans safe in the knowledge that the Austrians & Poles will do sod all.

NEWS FLASH ! NEWS FLASH !!

Age of enlightenmemt in G9 1699 - 1701 RIP

Following the Elector of Brandenburg & Duke of Prussia saying that little Philip of Spain was not a miracle birth and calling the Dowager Queen of Spain a Harlot who cuckolded her dieing (and famously famously unfertile) husband with a lusty lad from the Cardinals Guards a very annoyed Spanish Hapsburg Army has crossed the River Mass heading east to avenge its insulted Queen by hanging the elector from the Brandenburg gate!  

The words "The Lady does protest too much" & "Thats torn it" spring to mind.

The Elector can no doubt count on his noble allies from the Danzig Pact to stand by him. Charles of Sweden is always up for a fight and does not like Hapsburg Catholic Armies marching all over Northern Germany (Its upsets his Nobles & Pastors), Augustus the Strong   rather likes whores and would be the last man to condemn the Queen of Spain for her bit on the side but he is a man of his word , not one to duck a fight and what is more fancies the Electors sister (The young widowed Countess of Courland).

The big question now is what if anything will the Emperor do now his harlot or grossly insulted (depending on your view point) sister-in-law has started a war with the Electors & Princes of the Empire over a matter of "Hapsburg family honour"      

Meanwhile to really twist the knife the Doge of Venice has continued to mock the Emperor and has now claiming the protection of France & the Pope as well as the Halot-Queen of Spain. Also the Russian Envoy just happened to be on hand to see a spare Baby being smuggled out of the Palace in Madrid.

Interesting Choice.

If I were the emperor, I would have gone for the Doge first.

Reicharmee Marche!!!!!

Goldstar wrote:Reicharmee Marche!!!!!

But march on who?

The Elector of Prussia for insulting the Emperor's sister in law?

The Spanish for attacking a Prince of the Empire?

Or the Doge of Venice being a very, very, very bad man and want to be Ottoman/French/Spanish catspaw who has threatened and carried out "acts of war" against Austrian interests?

I am with Goldstar:

- The Elector only said what everyone else was thinking.

- The Queen of Spain may be a Cardinal's whore but she is family.

Both sides would probably forgive the Emperor if he did not take sides.

- As for the Doge of Venice, what more does the bloke have to do to start the war he so clearly wants?

Also a bit of a land grab going on in the West Indies and Pacific with France and Spain both claiming islands.

Most colonies are money losers. I'm not sure what you get from some random tropical islands....

Deacon wrote:
Most colonies are money losers.  I'm not sure what you get from some random tropical islands....

As I see it X4 types of colonies offer value for money (with some colonies being of value in more than one way):

- Trade bases like Diu, Madras, Accra etc ........A Island base in the West Indies is clearly of great value to powers like Prussia, Venice, Flanders etc which do not have one and wish to trade in the America's but if you already have your trade base in that area the law of diminishing returns would seems to apply.

- Strategic bases on trade routes and choke points like Cape Town, Saint Helena, Malta etc these help trade by offering watering, repair and re-supply facilities to merchants on long trips. They also allow Fleets to recover sickness levels in the same way and act as bases for crusiers. In the big war in G7 between France and the Dutch/Hapsburgs the poor French Merchants traders with China got butchered trying to slip through the Dutch in the East Indies, round the Cape & past Spain.

- Colonial Markets for Home Industy.......such as the American mainland colonies of Spain, France, Portugal & England which have large populations.

- Colonies which produce valuable colonial products such as Sugar Islands in the West Indies, Spices from the Dutch East Indies etc.

If your new colony does not tick any of these boxes you are either the proud owner of a rock with a very expensive flag on it or :

The Holy Roman Emperor in G2 - who has a penal colony for people he does not like - The fact that its "Australia" is probably a reflection of the number of people he does not like.

The King (Chief Farmer) of Spain - most of whom think success in Glory du Roi is measured by ploughing up any entry spaces they can find on the map.

Your colonies are a massive monetary resource, and if done properly can really benefit your treasury.

This game seems to have moved far away from the pursuit of enlightenment with a Spanish army taking out Prussian territories in the Rhineland. What will the Emperor do, when a Hapsburg, Catholic power declares war against a German Protestant power? Especially as the Spanish and Austrian branches of the family seem to now hate each other!
The French have yet to throw their hand in, and as a grey eminance lurking behind all this are the Venetians. Augustus the Strong of Saxony seems to be going for the role playing of the character, and what do the anti Catholic/French English make of it all.
As Sweden, I naturally think it is all one big Catholic plot to create uniformity of belief in the Empire. Time to mobilise the army then, but against who?

Actually the game does seem to be balanced on a "Philosopical issue" either you believe:

1) That by a miracle of divine intervention the dieing and infertile King of Spain managed to father a healthy baby boy and all of these other babies heading in and out of the back gates are nothing to do with it.

or

2) You dont believe that God intervined to save the Spanish Hapsburg Line.

If you believe the first then the Elector of Brandenburg is a liars who has wickedly tarnished the reputation of a noble lady and if you are a true Gentleman you would call him out! or give him a damn good thrashing with a horse whip.

or

If you believe the second the Elector is an honest man standing up for morality and the sancity of marriage vows.

Oddly the silence on this key issue has been deafening and the one man brave (or mad) enough to stand alongside the upright and moral Elector of Brandenburg and say he speaks the truth and the lady is a whore is that infamous libertine Augustus the Strong.

If Sweden stands by the Danzig pact as well does this mean the Spanish Invaders will eventually face "The Good, The Bad & the Ugly"  

We never had type of problem with Spain before (just an issue about the balance of power) I blame it all on Venice myself. Not quite sure how the Doge set this up but he is generally to blame 99.9% of the time.

All very 1914, Austrian aultimatum, interlocking Alliances, Venice and Spain seemly determined on a general European war?

Goldstar wrote:All very 1914, Austrian aultimatum, interlocking Alliances, Venice and Spain seemly determined on a general European war?

To add to the 1914 feel the ruler's of Spain & Austria are close relatives!

I can understand that Spain has picked on a Prussian Protestant Vassel of the Emperor over something he said as a way of diverting her brother in law from doing nasty things to the Doge of Venice but why has she now declared war on the Polish Commonwealth?

Ok so Augustus waded in on the side of the Prussian Elector but he did that as Elector of Saxony. So surely the Queen-Regent (or The Great Whore of Madrid if you are member of the Danzig Pact) should have declared war on Saxony not Poland?)

Is this just a ploy so Spanish & Venetian Ships can deploy to Danzig & the Baltic?

Bet the Dutch, English & French will love that the Dodgy Doge of Venice trying to get his nasty paws all over their supplies of hemp, tar, timber, saltpetre etc.

Guess the key questions in G9 are now:

1) What black mail worthy info does the Doge of Venice hold over the Spanish Regency to make it dance to his tune?

2) As the advance forces of Spain march from Flanders and Venice which one is the main force and which one is the faint?

3) With the Hapsburgs drawing swords on each other will the King of France & the Ottomans get over almost dieing due to laughing so much?

Hmmm...could we see an UDP-English-French alliance then, aiming to use the Venetian fleet as target practice?

I guess we have seen odder alliances...

Jason wrote:Hmmm...could we see an UDP-English-French alliance then, aiming to use the Venetian fleet as target practice?

I guess we have seen odder alliances...

You mean like Spain, Venice & the Golden Horde Slavers?

Stuart Bailey wrote:

Jason wrote:Hmmm...could we see an UDP-English-French alliance then, aiming to use the Venetian fleet as target practice?

I guess we have seen odder alliances...

You mean like Spain, Venice & the Golden Horde Slavers?

That would be one example!

June Jounal des Scavans has shown up and it would seen that "enlightened" attitudes are now limited too:

1) Fine Art lovers ......Lord Fong & The Great Moghul.

&

2) The Opera loving Prince of Bavaria.

Mind you after after the Prince of Bavaria's attempt to stop the war between Austria & Venice by the power of the arts and fine  Bavarian diplomacy fell flatter than a pan cake when both the principals left Munich to join their armies with mutual expressions of "see you on the battlefield in July." Even the Prince of Bavaria feeling of "enlightenment" and "calm" are believed to have taken a dent.  But everyone who stayed around for long enough agreed that Munich with its new baroque buildings inc the Opera House and gardens is looking very nice.

Oddly with Austria & Venice now at war from the 1st July 1701 and a Spanish Army already landed in Venice.  The Spanish Govt put out a "clarification" to say its not at War with Austria in support of its ally Venice.  Perhaps the Spanish Army are only on leave.......looking to take in some Art & Culture in Venice before the Austrians burn it down?

The Spanish "Clarification" did confirm that Spain has declared War on Prussia and its Allies in Saxony & the Polish Commonwealth.  Unfortunately it missed the other Prussian allies in the Swedish Empire.  But Charles XII called in the Spanish Ambassador to confirm that Spain is also at War with Sweden.

Adding to Spanish problems are someone stole its Army Papers and a poor harvest.....and yes the Elector of Prussia had a good one......which some may see as Divine Comment of the Elector's doubts about the new "King" of Spain actually being the son of Carlos II.

The Spanish also suffered a near 100% defeat in the Imperial Diet with only Upper Guelderland and Luxembourg (both Spanish territory) voting against the montion that the Spanish should leave the Prussian territory they have invaded.  Though a few others were against a proposal that if they dont leave the Reicharmee is to throw them out!  Considering the way the Austrians voted it seems that even the Queen Regent of Spain's in laws are starting to have doubts about who Phillip of Spain's real father is.

But in the dark corridors of Diplomacy it would seem that the Emperor is worried about "rape" and "dire threats to an tiny babe to keep its mother in line" rather than the Prussian theory backed by Saxony and Sweden that the Queen-Dowager is a whore and an unfaithful wife.

The Emperor is also concerned that the Doge is an un-elected usurper and is talking about liberation for Venice & Milan.  Still being called a "illegitimate false Doge" is a bit better than being called a "Italian Pimp and Mountebank".

However, its not all bad new for the Spanish Hapsburg (?????) Monarchy of King Philip of Spain.  Both Venice & England have declared that the the Spanish declaration of war against the nasty Elector of Prussia who insulted the Queen-Dowagers honour to be fair and justified and urged the Spanish on (.......to Berlin, Desden, Warsaw, Stockholm?!).

One really has to wonder if some people have the best interest of the Spanish Army at heart when cheering them on like that.  

Meanwhile at Versailles the Sun King is very busy ordering a bunch of Swedish Scientists to "get of my land" and sorting out Wine Labels. Clearly the rest of Europe can be going to hell in an handcart but provided everything is "just so" with French Wine G9 remains the most Enlightened and Civilized Game.........what a relief